Colin, this was very well written. I could feel the anger in my chest while reading this. Starting in a role that was very good in financial services and then a brief stint of being in the thick of this^ made me realize how good I had it before. It amazes me how many people get sucked into this environment and truly believe that climbing to the top here is what will bring them success and happiness. Some of the things you hear or witness in this environment are mind blowing.
In the end, I'm grateful I had a chance to experience it because now I know that this is absolutely not my dream.
Have you read the book Discussion Materials? Would recommend if you haven't.
Thanks so much, Julia! I’m so glad it resonated with you. Yeah it’s honestly crazy. When my boss Liz left, she told me it felt like unplugging from the Matrix.
It’s hard, because the money definitely was good, and it made life a lot easier. But I was also so miserable by the end, I don’t think I could go back. I’d much rather do work that feels rewarding.
No, I actually haven’t heard of it. I’ll definitely go check it out!
I really related to the tension in this between a life that looks successful from the outside and one that actually feels right from the inside.
I also appreciated that you didn’t reduce it to “corporate life is bad” or “money doesn’t matter.” Money can absolutely make life easier. But there’s a point where your body, your values, and your everyday experience start giving you information that is hard to keep explaining away.
That question of how long we stay because something looks good on paper, even when it no longer feels like us, is such an important one.
Yeah, I definitely don’t think that! Having money was great! It removed so much stress from my life. Unfortunately, I just happened to gain a lot of stress back because I didn’t like what I was doing for work!
I think for me I just decided that doing something a bit more meaningful was more important to me. But I the ideal world is to find something meaningful that pays well!
The loss of status is probably the hardest part. It’s super nice to just be able to say you work at “x big company” and not explain anything else. People just accept that you’re cool. But honestly, it’s pretty shallow in the end, so I’m trying to tell myself I don’t need to worry about that anyway!
There’s something powerful in choosing meaning over a label, even when it feels less impressive from the outside. And yes — the dream is definitely finding the thing that feels meaningful and also pays well.
I think the more interesting question becomes: what kind of success actually feels worth maintaining once nobody else is there to applaud it?
Capitalism without care can cause damage, fantastic essay Colin! While I do not have a proper corporate experience, I believe that applies to academia as well, where things also get super cut throat regarding publications, tenure ship ,etc....and if it does not stop it gets toxic and hazardous to health as well! Best wishes for your future journey!
Colin that line about looking at where you end up if you win felt sharp and useful. It turns career choices into a better question than just pay or status. I also kept thinking about the month of 8:30 to 8:30 meetings, then working until 4 a.m. At some point your body is giving an honest review, even when your resume says things are going well. I think a lot of people need that reminder before five years go by.
"Scott Galloway was right—sometimes your body tells you things your mind doesn't want to accept." This hit so hard.
The transition from corporate golden handcuffs back to work that aligns with your values is terrifying, but as your story shows, absolutely necessary. Beautifully written, Colin! 🌿
I really Loved this article Colin!! I can relate SO much to the corporate rat race. I spent 10 years in big companies, and have recently moved to a much smaller one. I’ll never say any place is “perfect”, but corporate definitely is this weird competition I didn’t sign up for. I’ll admit I was part of the game and climbing the ladder , but since my son was born in 2024 I have lost a lot of interest in all that. Money is important to me, but as you mentioned it is not everything.
Hoping I can eventually go on my own, but I know that may be a little down the road! Great work🎉
I’m really glad you liked it, Danielle! I hear ya. It’s hard to find a workplace that actually has a good culture. I haven’t had any kids yet, but I’m sure that definitely changes how you think k about things.
From what I’ve seen, I definitely think you have it in you! I’m sure you’ll do it.
Mate, this is easily on my top 3 articles I read so far in this platform.
Marco & Lume as a brand tries to be chill, but the person behind has a deep, deep anger towards rats.
"Capitalism without care causes damage. And ambition without virtue creates tyrants."
Fighting against this might be a lost cause, but one worth fighting anyway.
Otherwise, those "rats" (I usually call them something not so nice) already won, and there won't be much of a world to live in a couple decades from now.
Great f * * * * * read mate, truly. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you for sharing, @Daniel Thetford! I’m glad you liked it!
Thanks for sharing @David McIlroy!
Thank you for the restack @Jenny Schmitt, PhD! Really glad you liked it.
Colin, this was very well written. I could feel the anger in my chest while reading this. Starting in a role that was very good in financial services and then a brief stint of being in the thick of this^ made me realize how good I had it before. It amazes me how many people get sucked into this environment and truly believe that climbing to the top here is what will bring them success and happiness. Some of the things you hear or witness in this environment are mind blowing.
In the end, I'm grateful I had a chance to experience it because now I know that this is absolutely not my dream.
Have you read the book Discussion Materials? Would recommend if you haven't.
Thanks so much, Julia! I’m so glad it resonated with you. Yeah it’s honestly crazy. When my boss Liz left, she told me it felt like unplugging from the Matrix.
It’s hard, because the money definitely was good, and it made life a lot easier. But I was also so miserable by the end, I don’t think I could go back. I’d much rather do work that feels rewarding.
No, I actually haven’t heard of it. I’ll definitely go check it out!
I really related to the tension in this between a life that looks successful from the outside and one that actually feels right from the inside.
I also appreciated that you didn’t reduce it to “corporate life is bad” or “money doesn’t matter.” Money can absolutely make life easier. But there’s a point where your body, your values, and your everyday experience start giving you information that is hard to keep explaining away.
That question of how long we stay because something looks good on paper, even when it no longer feels like us, is such an important one.
Yeah, I definitely don’t think that! Having money was great! It removed so much stress from my life. Unfortunately, I just happened to gain a lot of stress back because I didn’t like what I was doing for work!
I think for me I just decided that doing something a bit more meaningful was more important to me. But I the ideal world is to find something meaningful that pays well!
The loss of status is probably the hardest part. It’s super nice to just be able to say you work at “x big company” and not explain anything else. People just accept that you’re cool. But honestly, it’s pretty shallow in the end, so I’m trying to tell myself I don’t need to worry about that anyway!
There’s something powerful in choosing meaning over a label, even when it feels less impressive from the outside. And yes — the dream is definitely finding the thing that feels meaningful and also pays well.
I think the more interesting question becomes: what kind of success actually feels worth maintaining once nobody else is there to applaud it?
Capitalism without care can cause damage, fantastic essay Colin! While I do not have a proper corporate experience, I believe that applies to academia as well, where things also get super cut throat regarding publications, tenure ship ,etc....and if it does not stop it gets toxic and hazardous to health as well! Best wishes for your future journey!
Thanks for the kind words, Apurva! I’m really glad it resonated with you!
Colin that line about looking at where you end up if you win felt sharp and useful. It turns career choices into a better question than just pay or status. I also kept thinking about the month of 8:30 to 8:30 meetings, then working until 4 a.m. At some point your body is giving an honest review, even when your resume says things are going well. I think a lot of people need that reminder before five years go by.
Really glad you liked the essay, Jeff! Yeah I definitely think the environment caught up with my health after a few years
"Scott Galloway was right—sometimes your body tells you things your mind doesn't want to accept." This hit so hard.
The transition from corporate golden handcuffs back to work that aligns with your values is terrifying, but as your story shows, absolutely necessary. Beautifully written, Colin! 🌿
So glad you liked it! Ironically I only read that quote the day before I published the essay, but it fit perfectly and I had to include it.
But yeah it definitely is a very scary feeling!
That’s the beauty of timing—some quotes just find their way into an essay exactly when they’re meant to! 🌿
I really Loved this article Colin!! I can relate SO much to the corporate rat race. I spent 10 years in big companies, and have recently moved to a much smaller one. I’ll never say any place is “perfect”, but corporate definitely is this weird competition I didn’t sign up for. I’ll admit I was part of the game and climbing the ladder , but since my son was born in 2024 I have lost a lot of interest in all that. Money is important to me, but as you mentioned it is not everything.
Hoping I can eventually go on my own, but I know that may be a little down the road! Great work🎉
I’m really glad you liked it, Danielle! I hear ya. It’s hard to find a workplace that actually has a good culture. I haven’t had any kids yet, but I’m sure that definitely changes how you think k about things.
From what I’ve seen, I definitely think you have it in you! I’m sure you’ll do it.
I’m so big on work culture!! I even led the
Employee engagement group at one of my jobs ! It is hard to find places that really value that though!
And thanks so much it means a lot!! I have a hard time believing in myself some days, but getting better!!
Mate, this is easily on my top 3 articles I read so far in this platform.
Marco & Lume as a brand tries to be chill, but the person behind has a deep, deep anger towards rats.
"Capitalism without care causes damage. And ambition without virtue creates tyrants."
Fighting against this might be a lost cause, but one worth fighting anyway.
Otherwise, those "rats" (I usually call them something not so nice) already won, and there won't be much of a world to live in a couple decades from now.
Great f * * * * * read mate, truly. Thank you for sharing this.